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He Walk Among Us, But He's Not One Of Us

June 18, 2010

EveryBody Change At Some Point In Life But Not Completely

Remember any of ur childhood memories which when u thought bout it, u'll go, goddamn it, i was stupid kid back then. well, reality check back on present timeline. notice any differences between us back then n now? a lot aite? well call me liar, but still there are some of our personality or just simply stupid attitude that never ever change eversince. well, thats life. we never change completely. as for me, the stuck up bastard 6 years ago n present day me well, there still a lot of similarity between us. well if according to tv series How I Met Your Mother, Ted Mosby like to call this comparison is Past Us n Doppelganger Us. the catchphrase for it is "5 years ago Robin, she's cool, but doppelganger Robin, she's hell of a girl".. yes, we may have change from what we are in the past, change either toward something better or downfall straight to hell, but still there are still a part of us, stay the same. not just how we look, but our personality will never ever change completely. we are still who we are back then.the only different is maybe we grow older n maturely change but there still same thing that stay the way they are. call me pussy or whatever, but i do thing that 6 yar ago me and Dopperganger me still the same guy in the inside. i still make the same stupid mistakes like i'd done 6 years ago, and repeatedly making it eventhough i know i've growth smarter but it just how i will react on the situation n because in the past for the situation thats how i react, i cant never change the reaction for the same situation. maybe its my guts to chnage that still ebing a pussy but no matter how mature or smart i've grown, but still the same mind of me 6 years ago, control my entire action. thats just who i am. i never change completely i guess. if i do, well i'll no longer know who i am. maybe its the reason, i dont wanna change completelt. i still wanna hold tight to the old me, because it remind me of the past, the sweet innocent me who wanna explore everything n learn new stuff. but now, when i explored everything n know how fuck up this world is, it make me want more to hold on to the old me. get what im saying?

June 16, 2010

Fuck You Chuck Bartowski

in Chuck Season 2 finale chuck said that,

"Follow Your Heart, You Mind Is Only Gonna Mess Everything up"..

well in my case, i am messed up as i am right now because i follow my heart n silenced my brain.
well, its true ur mind going mess everything up esspecially when i come down to pleasing our heart. it is cuz mind is moving n calculating every damn possibility while heart only time, follow the voice in ur head aCe+, not ur heart. chuck bartowski is wrong

"Follow Your Mind, Your Heart is Only Gonna Mess Everything Up"

p/s- i wanna be like before when i am aCe+ not Adam Ar-Rashid. aCe+ is the idea of being free, Adam Ar-Rashid is the real deal. i guess i wanna runaway from who i am. thats the whole idea of aCe+

June 14, 2010

Broken Heart

The first time I saw you, you look so riddle,
Never thought that you the type of twaddle,
Yeah I admit, maybe I was being stupid,
It’s something I trait not what plead.

My heart sassed when I near you,
I don’t wanna anything else but to hold you,
To get to know you, to reach deeper in you,
Well, I did but I don’t know that there’s a price tag around you.

You gave me a lot of sign of interest,
All seems so real or maybe it’s something else
Because deeply I know my heart always make a mess
It silenced my mind’s lissomness, put it down to rest.

Do you remember the night I waited you in the rain?
Outside your window, I was sitting near the sewer drain,
Waiting for you to come down to unlock my love chain,
It’s so cute and romantic; at least that’s what I thought,
When you finally come down with the yellow umbrella you brought,
We were sitting together, cutely leaning but awkwardly odd.

Do you remember the first time you asked me to kiss your cheek?
I was surprised as hell but it was so damn sweet,
I didn’t go for it just yet for the first time you request.
I just standstill until waited you to make a second request,
When you did that I didn’t think twice.
Yes, and I did it, I kiss your cheek, twice.

“Tomboy Bucuk” that’s your nick and mine are “Bapok Cute”,
It’s doesn’t seem lovey dovey whatsoever, it’s seem rude,
But that’s what made us unique and well suited,
But why now, out of nowhere it’s all become mute?

Everything seem fairytale but pickle storm arived,
Out of sudden you become cold and derived,
You left me in the dark with no clue to start guessing,
The only thing I know that my heart is racing,
Racing to be near yours,
But you ripped it away, outsource.

Tomboy Bucuk, you left me heart-broken,
What’s had I done that is so unforgiven?
Don’t you remember the sweet time we had at the beach?
Or it;s just another gestureshrug that you wanna teach?
Why, and what’s wrong have I done to deserve this damnation?
I thought we were on the track of relation,
Suddenly you change and never turn back,
Leaving me confused and out of track,
One silly joke and you fuck me, reckless
And you wanna throw away the snapped pictured of us?

If war you asked than I got no other choice,
It’s my own mistakes to listen to my inner voice,
I shouldn’t be falling for you, definitely no,
I should just keep my heart lock and stay low,
But I’m stupid enough to let it open,
I just never learn,
Learn to never make to same old mistakes,
Learn to never to give unless there’s something to take,
But now I’ve learn something, not just how to let my heart stitch,
You wanna know what it is? It’s that you are a BITCH..

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