You think you know ace? think again.. you think you know Adam? think again.. you think you know me? think again.. close your eyes. imagine someone. he dress like no others. nothing special. graphic tshirt. 3/4 shorts. slippers. a lil bangle on his arm.. he said nothing special. just like "weh, hampa dok wat apa tuh?".. who come cross your mine? a dude which kinda look like anak mami? mat rempit? typical malay boy? now, open your eyes. who do you see? a malay dude, a pure chinese look. suprise? well, shame on you.. is not a new stuff to me.. cuz i got that a lot. yes, maybe is hard for you to understand by understanding this, but i am differeent. i learned that fact, each n single day, daily basis. yes, i am malay with chinese looking appearance.but yet again, try to look deep inside me. it just like what i to quo, "aku ni muka ja macam cina, tapi dalam aku pure melayu".. i dun even like chinese food or even their culture. goddamn, i dun even good in using chopstick. trust me, ajam better. know matter how hard , people will never get the "mamat-ni-cina" thought out of their head. I AM A ULTIMATE OUTSIDER. imagine this. if i wanna hit on somebody, gurl of course, first think cross their mine, "mamat ni cina la".. thats ussuallt happen with malay gurls. take the same sitaution with chinese gurl. "OMG, his not a chinese". try to imagine my possibility of sucess? yeah, its really damn low. well, its hard to be me.. its hard to be ultimate outsider. but if i wanna make friends, i dun hav e to sweat it out damnly hard. cuz its nothing to do about my appearance cuz whats matter in friendship is personality n chemistry.plus, i love making new friends. but is damn hard for me to find a girlfriend though. u have no idea how the hardness always bring me down. but i never failed to try. but is a shame how people love to treat others by the way they look, not on how they are. so azam, there's ur answer. thats why my-sort-of-girlfriend-type-or-my-ex-girlfriend alway look so indian-ish. hana aka "My Angel", malay punjabi mixture. Nabila "My shiteru" or "lil blood angel", lagi r hitam berkilat. even Diyana kinda dark skin. Linda maybe the only one whom can be consider as normal looking appearrancely. shes really malay looking type a girl. its not that i dun like amoi-looking type of girl, but i just dun have luck on hitting them. once, i almost got one, Renee'. but this goes bad from the beginning, or maybe its bad timing. well, thats just the price i have to pay for being malay/chinese. sometimes when people said "ang xpa la ang mix, senang r nak dapat awek", i just wanna scream out u guys a damn lucky u guys look purely malay, or purely chinese. cuz a mix like me, its hard. i cant hit on purely malay looking gurl, cuz they will always think im a chinese. i cnat hit n chinese girl, cuz they will always reject a malay dude. so, if you think u know me, THINK AGAIN!!!
